The following three spreads are those which I submitted for the deadline on Friday 13th May.
I eagerly awaited feedback as, while I am proud of these spreads and do like them, I needed some more advice as I felt I had tried almost every variation of my spreads. I have a habit of going to centred text when I feel nothing else looks good, as in my opinion it always makes text look neat and readable.
I took the following from David’s feedback:
The background colour of the first spread was too dark with the black text. The body copy was very heavy and could do with being broken up with more call-outs. On the second spread, I needed to explore pace with text more, though the imagery was strong visually. The border of the third spread was too narrow and it was not easy to tell what the border was made up of if you didn’t already know. I could also conduct more exploration with the text. I also needed to add a subheading, possibly extend the body copy, enlarge my margins and make more use of my grid.
I spent a lot of time experimenting further with the advice given on my spreads. I applied changes and played around for a long time, and finally, the following three spreads are those which I have printed and will appear in the exhibition.
On the first spread, I lightened the background, which I think looks much better. I also added a subheading at the bottom of the page, connected to the title using the asterisk. I added a second call-out and shorted the columns so that there was slightly less text on the page. I changed the second spread quite considerably and it was definitely the most difficult. My task was working around the hand image which I knew I wanted to include, as it had to sit at the bottom of the page because of the way I took the photographs and where they cut off. I would’ve placed the body copy at the bottom of the page if it weren’t for the image, however I am glad now that I didn’t as I feel this would have looked too similar to the first spread. I used the quote from the original spread and edited it slightly. I played around with placement of this quote a lot. I tried placing it behind the hands, as if they were holding or grasping it, but not enough of the text was visible for it to be legible. I tried with the text in different colours over the hands, across the top and bottom and staggered in a more abstract way across the page. I looked back over post modern typography workshops and research and experimented with some ideas, however I felt that ultimately these attempts didn’t fit well with the overall theme of my spread, and the theme and tone of the article itself. I like that this page is almost symmetrical, because the other two are so asymmetrical. The third spread is my favourite to look at as a whole spread. I think pulling a few windmills out and widening the border worked well and it gave more room for white space and abstract positioning. I think the right aligned quote works well next to the column of text. I liked the idea of picking out the speech between the men in the article in red as I feel it not only makes it easy to read as a conversation, but it adds to the tone and emotion in the conversation. I added call-out on the right hand side to break up the body text. I experimented with the conversation portion of the text, making each piece of text look how (I imagine) it was delivered, illustrating tone, volume and emotion. However this was difficult to create whilst still maintaining suitable line length, line spacing and kerning.
I am happy overall with my spreads and I have thoroughly enjoyed this project. I feel like I could work on this project forever and never think my spreads were perfect, so I’m glad there is a deadline to stop me going insane from type detailing!